Why Peer Groups Are Not Always Enough

Research & Sources / Mentorship & Sounding Boards

Picture a round table with eight entrepreneurs. Each one shares a challenge, the others give ideas, everybody leaves with new energy. It is a great format. Now picture one of them with a question they cannot say at that table: “I think I want to sell the company and do something completely different.” Some questions need a round table. Some need a quiet room.

What peer groups do well

Peer groups, mastermind circles and CEO roundtables bring real benefits. Leaders who often feel alone suddenly meet people with the same problems. Vistage, one of the largest CEO peer networks, describes how peer relationships help leaders deal with the isolation that comes with the top job.¹

• You hear how others solved similar problems.
• You get practical ideas fast.
• You feel less alone with the pressure.
• You stay motivated by others’ progress.

Where they fall short

Time per person is short. In a group of eight, each person gets a small slice of attention. Deep, personal questions rarely fit into twenty minutes.

Advice comes fast. Peer groups are full of experienced people with strong opinions. That is useful for practical problems, but for complex decisions, many quick answers can push you towards someone else’s solution before you understand your own question.

Some things are too sensitive. Doubts about a co-founder, thoughts about selling, personal struggles, mistakes you are ashamed of. Even in a trusted group, people filter what they say.

Groups develop habits. Over time, groups can settle into shared views and comfortable agreement. Researchers call the extreme form groupthink.²

The quiet room

One-to-one support, from a mentor or a thinking partner, offers what the round table cannot: time, confidentiality and full attention on one person’s situation. Research supports its value. Meta-analyses of workplace coaching found positive effects on performance, well-being and the ability to pursue goals.³

Use both

The best combination for many leaders is both: the round table for breadth, ideas and community, and the quiet room for depth, difficult decisions and personal direction. Each fills the other’s gaps.

What this means for you this week

• List the questions you bring to your peers, and the ones you never would.
• Notice which list holds your biggest decisions.
• If you have no peer group, look for one at your stage and size.
• If you have no quiet room, consider who could offer one.

Sit at the round table. And keep a key to the quiet room.

Sources

1. Vistage Research Center (2021). Why Many Leaders Feel Lonely at the Top. vistage.comHierarchy, the pressure to look confident and the weight of decisions make leadership lonely; peer groups and outside relationships help.
2. Wikipedia. Groupthink (overview of Irving Janis’s concept and later research). en.wikipedia.orgHow the wish for harmony in a close group can override realistic appraisal of alternatives.
3. Theeboom, T., Beersma, B. & van Vianen, A. E. M. (2014). Does coaching work? A meta-analysis. The Journal of Positive Psychology, 9(1), 1-18. doi.orgCoaching improves performance, well-being, coping, work attitudes and goal-directed self-regulation.